A Legacy Of Her Own

Today we celebrate the life of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.  The famous civil rights leader and activist who fought for freedom and social justice for all americans through non-violence.  The work he did for our country was extraordinary.  Every year on the memorial of his birthday the news stations reports on his legacy.

Today however, was a little different.  On Good Morning America today, the report was on the woman that shared a life with Dr. Martin Luther King Jr; his wife Coretta Scott King. On today’s show Robin Roberts sat down with Bernice King, the youngest of the King children.  They discussed the new memoir of Coretta Scott King, My Life, My Love, My Legacy written by journalist Barbara Reynolds.

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I found it interesting to hear about the legacy of Coretta Scott King.   Not only was she a devout wife, mother and Christian, she was also a civil rights leader and activist in her own right.  During the interview Bernice King tells us that her mother was the architect of the King legacy and what we know of her father is due to her mother’s resilience and determination. In fact it is because of Coretta Scott King that we celebrate the birthday of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.  She fought for 15 years to make Martin Luther King Jr day a federal holiday.

She was a very courageous woman.  When the King family residence was bombed it was Coretta Scott King that was home at the time.  Having her home bombed did not scare her off.  She was dedicated to her husband and to the cause.  She continued to fight for civil rights for many years to come.

There was never before seen interview clips that were shown of Mrs King.  In one of the clips you hear Coretta Scott King recall a time when she spoke to her husband and she says how she told him, “I love being your wife and the mother of your children but if that was all I did I would go crazy.”

I must say, hearing her say that really puts a smile on my face. She was loving and caring but she was not timid.  She spoke up for what she wanted.  If you think of the fact that she was with him in the 50’s and 60’s and during those times a lot of women did not speak up for what they wanted. I love the fact that she had a voice. She was a very strong woman who spoke up for what she believed in whether it was in her home or outside of her home.

I can’t wait to order this book. I look forward to reading it.  If you think this is going to be a good read please comment below .    

Also check out the full GMA interview  in the link below:

http://abcnews.go.com/video/embed?id=44799163
“People fail to get along because they fear each other; they fear each other because they don’t know each other; they don’t know each other because they have not communicated with each other.” Martin Luther King Jr.

“Struggle is a never ending process. Freedom is never really won, you earn it and win it in every generation.” Coretta Scott King

It’s Ok,You Don’t Have To Do Everything

When I started this blog  last January I was on a quest to become a domestic goddess.  I was committed to writing a blog post three times a week. The previous year has come to an end and a new year has begun; and well I’m no domestic goddess and it’s been a minute since I’ve written anything (I take that back. I write all the time but, I haven’t posted anything). My last post was April 2016, which was the same time I decided that I was going to be super mom and show my kids that I still knew how to do a round-off at the age of 39.

In case you don’t know what a round-off is, it’s when you do a cart-wheel but midway while your feet are in the air you twist your body so that you can land with both of your feet together. When I was younger and 50 pounds lighter, doing a round-off always made me feel like I was a gymnast like Dominique Dawes, Mary Lou Retton or somebody.  However, on that day in April reality hit me like a ton of bricks.  I did the round-off but when I landed I sprained my ankle.  That’s when I realized that life as I know it is not the same.  I’m not the same.  I’m getting older and it’s time to face the fact that I can’t do everything.

I don’t know if the sprain caused it or the fact that I’m going to be 40 come this June, but that day I had an epiphany: IT’S OK TO NOT BE ABLE TO DO EVERYTHING.  I used to say that anything I put my mind to, I can do. Now this may be true but, just because you think of something doesn’t mean you have to do it or that you should do it.  

It’s also okay to say no from time to time.  You don’t have to help everybody.  I know to some that may seem mean and it may seem like it’s not the christian thing to do.  However, sometimes the best way to help someone is not to help them.  There is a very thin line between helping someone & enabling them.  

Adding too much to your plate by trying to do everything and by trying to help everyone can cause you to be overwhelmed.   Being overwhelmed can lead to you being stressed and being stressed can lead to health issues.

2 Corinthians 8:12-13 NLT tells us Whatever you give is acceptable if you give it eagerly. And give according to what you have, not what you don’t have. 13 Of course, I don’t mean your giving should make life easy for others and hard for yourselves. I only mean that there should be some equality.

I like that verse because  it reminds you that you can not give what you don’t have and that is ok.  As a wife and a mother  I used to feel guilty for not putting my family before myself.  I usually try my best to make sure everything is done as it should be but now I’m like, it’s ok if it’s not.  It’s ok if I forget things from time to time. It’s ok if I skip a week of laundry or if I don’t feel like cooking.  It’s even ok if I decide to put myself first from time to time.

Putting yourself first does not make you a selfish person.  It doesn’t make you a bad wife or a bad mother.  Putting yourself first allows you to regroup.  It allows you to be in tuned with the woman that you are so that you can be the best wife, mother, or caregiver to others.

As this year goes on I encourage each of you to take some guilt free time out for you.  Take a day to finish that book you’ve been reading; go shopping for yourself; get that mani-pedi.  Go to the beach and relax under the sun; or stay in bed all day and do absolutely nothing.  Whatever you chose just make sure you chose a time out for you to enjoy yourself.

Have a blessed year!

Kisa

2corinth812

 

 

 

 

Lunch Break: Friends with the Frenemy

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Last weeks lunch break connection posts were about connecting with a spouse.  This week is going to be about friendship connections.

Lately I’ve been seeing a lot of posts about  friends having an issue because their friend is friends with the someone they don’t like.  There are so many different memes out there saying, “Don’t trust someone who is friends with your enemy” or “If your friends are chilling with the enemy guess who is the topic of discussion. Even on reality TV shows, there seems to be an issue with this as well.

Personally I think its childish to not be friends with someone just because another person don’t like them.  Just because a friend has had a bad experience with someone doesn’t mean you are going to have that same experience.  We were not all made the same.  Which means we all have different personalities. Some personalities click and some don’t.  As an adult there are different levels to the person that you are.  You may be a mother, a wife, a business woman, a student, a chef or whatever. Each level of your life requires a different hat and with those hats comes different people.  This is a small world in which we live, so some of the people you find yourself interacting with from time to time may just be an enemy of a friend.

Does that make you a disloyal friend because you talk to the frenemy about a business deal? Maybe you and the frenemy have kids that are on the same soccer team. Is it disloyal for you to carry a conversation with that person while watching your kids play? No.  It doesn’t make you disloyal it makes you an adult.   As an adult you are able to interact with people from different walks of life without compromising your integrity.

A true loyal friend to me is not one that agrees on everything that you do.  Its one that is truthful to you at all times.  One that has your back even in your absence.  Meaning they can interact with the frenemy and your name will not be brought up but, if it does come up they will defend your honor like a soldier in the military defending its country.  They will not let anybody talk bad about you.

Think about it how can you say their loyal if they are only loyal because they do and agree with everything that you do? That doesn’t make them a loyal friend; it makes them a puppet.

 

There is always a way out

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1Corinthians 10:13 the temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure.

Every day you and I are tempted by something.  In today’s society temptations comes in many forms.  Something that seems innocent can turn into a life altering event.  Let’s take social media for example.  Many people are on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram & so many others.  Social media was created as a tool for people to connect with friends, family, co-workers and so on.  It really is an awesome tool because you are able to socialize with people from all over the world.  You can use social media to reconnect with loved ones, share ideas and network with potential business partners, just to name a few.  All of these things sounds wonderful on the surface but be careful because lurking beneath the surface is temptation. 

That old school friend you haven’t seen in years, who sends you a private message; that tweet you see about a business venture; or that Instagram pic you see advertising a sale at your favorite store are all things that seems innocent but remember temptation comes in many forms.   One of the main forms of temptation is enticement. The devil is always trying to find ways to entice you. 

To entice means to attract by arousing hope or desire.  I have given several examples but let’s take a minute and elaborate on the old school friend.  You haven’t seen this friend in years.  In the back of your mind you’ve wondered from time to time what happed to them.  Well now you see them on the screen and from the looks of it they haven’t aged much, so you smile at the friend request that you receive.  The message attached says “How are you, haven’t seen you in a while. Hope all is well.” 

Very innocent right?  Do you recognize the temptation? Do you see how one would be enticed?  Here you are married with children and a routine and along comes temptation dressed up as an old friend.  Enticing you with memories of what was. Providing you with the desire to wonder what could have been, BUT MY GOD, how wonderful he is!  He will always provide a way out. 

According to 1Corinthians 10:13 the temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure. In this situation that way out is the “confirm or delete” button.  Which one will you choose?  Are you going to succumb to temptation & click confirm or overcome it by clicking delete. 

God has given you free will so the choice is yours.  Maybe you’re saying to yourself that you don’t use the computer that often, however remember I said temptation comes in many forms.  The key is to recognize the temptation, recognize the way out and have the will power to get out.  With Jesus Christ by your side, you will be able to do just that.

I pray as you go about your day to day that God will give you the wisdom to recognize temptation & the power to make the right decision according to His will.

Enjoy your day. Be blessed.

The Answer is Already Provided

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The other day I was at work and my acid reflux started bothering me, so I asked my co-worker for some Tums. She didn’t have any. I told her how I was prescribed Prilosec but have yet to take it and that I was wishing it was with me now. Long story short when I got home that evening I looked in my purse the same purse I had with me at work and there was the Prilosec. The one thing I needed was there all along but only if I had taken the time to look for it.

That situation made me think that sometimes that’s how our blessings are. We are so busy consumed with doing things our way that we overlook the fact that God has already answered our prayers. We just need to be still for a moment and He will reveal the answer in due time.

When things happen and we are thrown off of our normal routines we tend to go into survival mode searching and looking and searching and looking and searching and looking but never finding the answer. Why, because we are searching and looking in the wrong place. We are looking where we feel like the answer should be, but all along God has already provided the answer. Before they call I will provide the answer, while they are still speaking I will hear. Isaiah 65:24

Focusing on the problems and the things we don’t have causes us to lose focus on that which we already have. Those things that we already have may very well be the blessing we need to get us to where we are trying to go. It’s like the story of the man in the flood.

There was a flood coming and the town officials sent a warning for everyone to evacuate. The faithful Christian man heard the warning but decided to stay, saying to himself, “I will trust God, God will save me and send a divine miracle if I’m in trouble.” His neighbors drove by and offered him a ride but he refused saying God will save me.

The faithful Christian man looked as the flood waters begin to rise onto his porch. Just then a man in a canoe paddled by and told him to get in because the waters are rising quickly but the faithful Christian declined, saying “God will save me.”

The waters rose higher and poured into his living room. A police motorboat saw the man in the window and said they will save him but the faithful Christian waved them away, saying “God will save me.”

The waters rose so high the man had to climb onto his roof. A helicopter seen the man on his roof and lowered its ladder but the man still refused, saying “God will save me.”

The flood waters rose so high that it swept the man away and he eventually drowned to death. When he made it to heaven he asked God why didn’t he save him and God said, “I sent a warning, a car, a paddle boat, a motorboat and a helicopter. What more did you want?

I don’t know who wrote that story but I love it because it’s a true example of how we can overlook what God has for us because we are too busy looking for and expecting something else.  It’s true God works in mysterious ways. The way you were expecting your blessing to come may not be the way that you will receive it. However, be opened minded to all that God brings your way because, that which seems small to you may be the very thing that moves your mountain.

 

 

Healthy Breakfast Options for Busy Families

Each night before I go to bed I tell myself that I’m going to get up and cook a healthy breakfast for my family.  Then reality sets in and the alarm goes off and I hit the snooze button one too many times. With 45 minutes to spare, I’m struggling to get out of bed, get the kids up, figure out what I’m going to wear, do my hair, wash up, brush my teeth and get out the house with out my husband saying come on family its time to go.  He’s like the timekeeper in the movie In Time, keeping track of everybody’s time.

After all that, cooking is the last thing I think about doing in the morning, so my family is left with making choices: eat at school/work, make a smoothie, eat cereal or eat oatmeal. Every so often miracles happen and time seems to stand still because those are the times I get out of bed 30 minutes to an hour earlier, put on Joyce Meyers and cook a nice breakfast . However, like I said those are when miracles happen, because in my household that rarely takes place.  So, I’ve decided to find some quick and healthy meals that I could make for busy mornings that would get my family out of the house with a healthy breakfast.

Ok never-mind I’m lying. LOL! Me. Cook. In the morning on a weekday. Yeah right.  I have gathered a list of healthy kid-friendly breakfast recipes, but whether you cook them on the weekday is up to you.  Me, personally I would try them on the weekend because I love cooking breakfast for my family on Saturdays and Sundays. It helps me to feel less guilty about not cooking for them throughout the week.

Since the weekend is approaching here are 5 kid-friendly breakfast recipes your family is sure to love.

1. Strawberry Cheesecake French Toast
strawberry cheesecakeGet the recipe at http://familyapron.com/

2. Breakfast Smoothie Bowl
smoothie bowl
Get the recipe at https://thecookbooklife.wordpress.com/

3. Italian Sausage and Spinach Strata
italian sauasage strata
Get the recipe at http://staceysstir.com/

4. Apple Cinnamon Pancakes
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Get the recipe at http://www.bettycrocker.com/recipes/apple-cinnamon-pancakes

5.Apple Tart
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Get recipe at http://www.womansday.com/food-recipes

 

 

Lunch Break: A little PDA won’t hurt nobody

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When was the last time you & your spouse put on a little public display of affection (PDA)? Was it at your wedding? If so that’s too long.

I remember there was a time where I felt embarrassed to hold my husbands hand in public or even kiss him in front of my parents. I used to think it was corny.  Now after 15 years of being together & 11 years being married, Im always on him & he’s always on me. 

If he’s walking a little in front of me I hold on to the back of his shirt or I’ll hold on to his arm or grab his hands . When we are in the store we randomly kiss, and if I see him bending over to pick something up I’ll tap him on his butt (he hates that though, “dont play with my butt” he says. lol). Kissing at the stop light, oh thats a must for us. Even if we are at a party with friends, if we are leaning against a wall or if I’m sitting on his lap I’ll give him a little impromptu lap dance. Before you gasp, Im not talking stripper club style. I’m talking just a little rotation of the hips while we’re leaned up against each other.

Now that I’ve gotten older I think random displays of affection in public to your spouse is fun. Its almost like foreplay. It gets you ready for the next episode yay yay yay yay yay….The Bedroom!  Where the magic happens. LOL! Ok let me stop.

Seriously though, PDA is all good as long as its tasteful. We don’t want to see y’all about to rip each others clothes off.  As long as you know how to keep it classy I say don’t be afraid to rub up on your man or give him a little smooch in public from time to time. After all, he did put a ring on it, didnt he? In that case show the world that being married is cool & fun!

Let go, let loose and have fun with your spouse.

Lunch Break: 7 ways to stay connected to your spouse

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Today instead of going on my daily walk and eating what I brought for lunch. I enjoyed a spontaneous lunch break with my husband; nothing fancy.  In fact we went to 7-11 (thank heaven for 7-11 LOL!) brought two melts, two drinks and two bags of chips.  When we got back to the car, instead of pulling off immediately my love pulled out his phone, went to YouTube and put on an episode of Martin.  We sat there like we were at a drive a drive-in movie, ate our lunch and enjoyed our time together.

Spending time with your spouse is very important and it doesn’t have to take a lot of effort.  Everything doesn’t have to be planned out.  You will be surprised at how just 30 minutes a day alone with your spouse can make a difference in your marriage.  I really cherish those moments even if it is just at a 7-11, because those are the times that we get to reconnect without the kids being around.  Those are the times that we get to be friends. We get to enjoy each others company without talking about bills or anything else that goes along with being married and running a household.

Do you seem to have trouble finding the time to connect with your love?  There are so many ways to reconnect on a daily basis.  I’ve listed seven ways that is sure to keep you connected to your love.

  1. Go for a walk together
  2. Have lunch together
  3. Window shop together
  4. Call each other throughout the day
  5. Have a quickie
  6. Go for a short drive together.
  7. Pray together

What does you and your spouse do to reconnect? If you can think of other ways to reconnect with your spouse when time is limited please comment below.

 

 

 

I’m Back

It’s been a while since my last post. I’ve been out of commission for a while, well not me per se, more like my laptop. You see two out of my four kids decided they were bored one day and what do bored kids do? They get into stuff and they do things that gets them in trouble. Ok, so boy genius (my 14 year old) and princess (my 10 year old) decided they were going to pillow fight. Now don’t get me wrong, I love a good pillow fight but there are rules to everything & the first rule to pillow fighting is remove things that are breakable, i.e. my laptop. Therefore, needless to say, they were pillow fighting, my laptop got caught in the cross fire & the screen came off the hinges. Instead of the monitor sitting upright, it now lays flat. My husband tried to screw it back together but that didn’t work.  We then put masking tape around it (ghetto I know lol) & that worked for a while but then the screen went black.  I was so pissed that I just put the laptop under my bed & told my children to never ask me for anything again.

For two months I was without my laptop until one day the light bulb went off in my head (ah haaaa) & I realized that I could attach a desktop monitor to the laptop and it should work. Being the thrifty girl that I am I decided to look on Craigslist, my local community Facebook yardsale page & OfferUp. Each day I would browse through those sites, then one day while having a casual conversation with my sister, I told her how I had been searching for a monitor. She told me she had one & that I could have it for free. I was ecstatic to say the least. What a blessing! I was not expecting her to have an old PC monitor because all of her computers are Macs. For her to have an old PC monitor at the very moment that I needed one & to give it to me for free was truly a blessing from God.

Some would say, “But thats your sister you should have expected it to be free.” Ah no. Just cause family has something that you need does not mean when they say you can have it that you should expect it to be free. Nothing in this world is free no matter who it’s coming from.  You should never expect everything to be free, that would mean your just a freeloader but you should always expect a blessing from God when you pray according to his will.  However, dont just stop at the prayer. You also have to have faith by doing work. Meaning, seek your blessing. Dont just think that because you pray, whatever you ask for will fall out of heaven into your lap. That would be crazy if that was the case.  You have to seek what you ask for & if it’s in Gods will, it will be given in His timing not yours. God is not a genie in a bottle. He does not grant your every wish. He is more like a father. He will bless you according to the plans that he has for your life. So dont get discouraged when your prayers are not answered just know God has a plan.

Jeremiah 28:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Matthew 7:7 Ask and it will be given; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.

Feel The Fear But Do It Anyway

Isaiah 41:13 for I am the Lord who takes hold of your right hand and says to you do not fear, I will help you.

There are many things in this world that can cause fear.  When you anticipate or worry about something bad happening, the emotion that takes over you is fear.  It often comes at the sight of danger, but more times than not it occurs when something new is about to happen.

Your first time standing in front of a crowd; your first time becoming a parent, even when you embark on a new career (going on a job interview can be nerve reckoning), maybe you decided to  go back to school after being out for so long, or maybe your starting a new relationship, getting married or even getting divorced and becoming single again after so many years. All of these things, which are new to us, causes fear because we are afraid of the unknown. We begin to play the “What If” game in our head.  What if this happen, or what if that happen.  What if I do this or what if I do that?

You can continue to play the “what if” game, which is just going to cause more fear or you can take control of your thoughts and trust in God.

Isaiah 41:13 tells us For, I am the Lord who takes hold of your right hand & says to you do not fear I will help you. God will not leave you nor forsake you. He is omnipresence which means he is there with you as you embark on this new journey.

Therefore do not be afraid to take the first step into the new, into the unknown.  Feel the fear & do it anyway! For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity but of power, love & self-discipline 2Timothy 1:7.

Go out and start something new today.  You never know, you may enjoy the journey.

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